I was sitting at camp the other day watching Autumn roll in with a cleansing rain, almost like it was washing the pallet of life in the world and preparing it for new colors. Leaves now slowly and turn in the breeze. The air is crisp and heavy all at the same time.
Right now, summer is holding fast, like someone suspended from an inevitable fall. Its grip fails ever so slightly as days grow shorter...
I tend to believe it is difficult for the seasons. A death each and every year. They are primed and alive and powerful for such a brief time and then they falter little by little, until that precious grip slips and they tumble away, free falling into some unknown place where they must rest to be reborn.
The older I become the more I appreciate each and every one of them. I have always considered myself a child of summer. I love the heat, the humidity, the frenzy of bees and flowers. The high sun and the long days. I have spent half a lifetime dreaming of warm places while the winter wind rages, thinking about how I will retire to a life of never having to think about putting on a coat and gloves to walk outside.
And now.... Now, oddly it occurred to me while at my beloved beach this year what my life would be without the opportunity to enjoy each and every season. To see life and death and renewal right before my eyes every few months. To know that nature is so close to me and that all I have to do is walk out the door and be in it. All of it. No matter what time of year. I decided I would not enjoy that life nearly as much or appreciate the opportunities it affords me.
So my mom lives in Florida and sits by her pool in October. I don't want to sit by a pool in October! I have other things to do in October. LOL. And I want to be saying to Sam when we are 90 - hey, they cleared the road of snow yesterday do you think we can get to camp? I want to plant stuff in the spring and wonder when the hummingbirds will return, to enjoy a warm fire on a frakin' cold night, hear the peepers for the first time each spring and squeal like a little kid with delight...
So, I guess I have become a season junkie in my old age and I hope to see SO MANY MORE of them come and go.