WHY are people so friggin unwilling to do what needs to be done? Or even what they are supposed to do, or being paid to do? Ya know, I too have dreams, aspirations and hopes. I want my world to be a certain way. I want to be free and feel magical everyday. I want my life to be full of love and light and only hang around people that make me feel good and I don't want to have confrontation in my life and if I feel a little off I don't want to have to go out in the world.... I want what I want. We all do. I also have bills to pay and a lifestyle I'd like to keep. Actually I strive to improve it. Again, most of us would like to improve our lifestyle whether we say we would or not. Now, that doesn't have to mean anything big it could simply mean have enough in savings for emergencies, trade in our clunker of an automobile that is always breaking down for something reliable, finish school, move forward in our careers....
And, OK, I fully understand it when a person wants to be true to herself or himself and that perhaps what they want to be true to isn't on page 17 of the "standard equation for optimal life advancement" manual. You know, they say they don't want to "sell out" to "the man". OK, I got that. I embrace things that are a little different, obviously, and I too pride myself on being a little left of center. I admit that I get a little chuckle that people work toward cookie cutter houses with white picket fences and 2.2 kids, perfect sets of dishware, and minivans with those little stick figures in the rear window.
But it does amaze me when perfectly intelligent people - people capable of being gainfully employed - pull the "I'm not gonna sell out" card and yet they always seem to get into one bad situation after another, usually directly related to the fact that won't get a "normal" job or a job at all and expect everyone around them to understand, bail them out or ignore the fact that they are full of sh^t.
Let me tell ya - i want to get paid to sit in the woods and write poetry! I really do. It would be my "dream job". Unfortunately, this will most likely NEVER happen. So I have little choice but to suck it up, go out there and try to earn a living. And so that's what I do.
Are there things I'd rather be doing? Most days absolutely. And let me stop you before you say - well, you are wasting your life then - because I'm talking about HELL YES I'd rather sleep till 10:00 everyday, I'd rather ride my horse at 10:30, go to the gym at Noon, then get sushi with my girlfriend every afternoon and go pub hopping and to the movies with Sam after that. I'd love to do ALL those things most days rather than DO MY JOB, I mean, wouldn't you? Do I allow that to provide me with an excuse to be a slacker? Absolutely NOT. Because without my JOB I would have no horse, couldn't afford sushi or movies and certainly not beer!
It is like this. You learn, you work hard, you (hopefully) get more experience and can better your circumstance through that experience. So, you earn money and improve your lifestyle. Yes - You improve your lifestyle. You might do this because you think it is just the way things go or because you feel like it is what is expected or for a million other reasons.
Maybe, like me, you might do this because it is the means to the ends. Doing all this - playing THE GAME that so many people claim to disdain, earns you money. Money earns you freedom. And freedom earns you the ability to experience more of the things you long to experience. Back to horses, sushi, movies and beer.... ;)
If you spend all your time trying not to sell out but you can't pay your bills and you are in credit card debt up to your eyeballs and your car is breaking down every week and....and....and....well how FREE OF THE MAN AND THE RULES are you really? You are more bullied by society than ANY of us that just embrace a
little dose of "societal normal" and do the thing that provides us with the freedom to BE WHO WE ARE without the baggage of worrying how we are going to pay the electric bill.
Just freakin' sayin...
And legs, and well, all those other parts we complain about.
I have to give credit to my beautiful friend Saturn Darkhope because it was her Facebook status I copied this from. And to Wild Woman Sisterhood, which is where she shared it from originally.
Because it got me thinking once again about the same old subject so many of us get our minds and souls wrapped up in. That conversation with ourselves ~ you know the one. The one in which we are not good enough, pretty enough, thin enough - oh shit wait it isn't just thin anymore it is STRONG enough (meaning it isn't enough to just be thin, as one blogger said not long ago, now we have to be ripped too), tall enough, sexy enough, smooth enough, perky enough (I speak of breasts not personality), hot enough, blah blah blah blah blah....
As a side note does anyone ever notice that the list of what is not "enough" about us usually doesn't include smart enough? Well, why would it? As a whole if we were smart enough we wouldn't be worried about any of the other "enough" that we worry about.
But alas, I digress....
I think that people mistake quotes like the one above as saying that we should all rebel against weight loss or exercise, being aware of how our bodies look, or the desire to make life changes for weight loss or exercise purposes. It is like some odd backlash - you know, like slut shaming only it is shaming women into the belief that if they are interested in their physical appearance they are just superficial nitwits.
I don't take it like that at all. I think it refers to the excesses we go to in pursuit of perfection, whatever perfection is at the moment. It also refers to the idea in our minds that we are not "enough" right now at our very core. That the essence of us is not worthy so we need to pursue this momentary preference for being ripped yet boob enhanced with lips like Angelina and able to run in four inch heels without breaking a sweat or an ankle.
I feel like there isn't anything wrong with wanting to lose weight or build muscle or, hell, even wanting to look great in a bikini. But you DO have to be able to separate your reality from what your are being sold as universal reality and whatever things you want to make happen once you have separated those "realities" cannot interfere with your choice to like your body NOW. To love your soul NOW. To celebrate your spirit NOW.
I'm not saying that getting exercise and eating good, wholesome food is not necessary. I tend to believe both are an important part of the puzzle of what makes us whole. But you don't need "industries" to do either of those things. Now, you might join a gym because it is easier to utilize than any other option - but, the gym itself doesn't have to make you question whether your like your body in the present. Unless you let your experience there and all the other static that chicks face on a daily basis related to our physical selves find a way in.
So, I think, related to the quote, which I LOVE btw, that we need to pay particular attention to the word "decided" when we read it. Because stuff like this doesn't just happen. Ironically enough, mind shifts are like exercise and diet themselves. They take practice. They take commitment. They take deciding each and every day and sometimes each and every minute to make a choice. So, that would mean that when it occurs to us to dislike any part of ourselves we must not only redirect those thoughts we must work consistently to make sure that it doesn't even occur to us.
Huge mind shift isn't it? A revolution inside our own heads. A quiet revolt against deep rooted negative talk and beliefs. Where can we even begin?
I think that first we have to be aware of the whole reality vs "sold" reality. We have to call it when we see it. We have to tell ourselves what it is whenever it finds a way into our own mind. We have to remind ourselves of our own personal reality often. However you decide to do these things is up to you but it is part of retraining your mind.
Then we have to celebrate ourselves daily. Just as we are. And know that we are part of something bigger and acknowledge that. For instance, I have come up with a morning ritual involving the use of my body and connecting it with the earth and the sky. I learned it in a recent workshop and have put my own spiritual twist on it. It involves thanking the spirit of each direction for their daily gifts and acknowledging the universe within my body (we ARE stardust ya know) and the earth on which we stand. It can be done in a short span of time or a longer one depending on what the morning holds. The point is to ground oneself through gratitude and to use the body to do so. So, basically you are shifting the focus from outside influences to one of thankfulness and the acknowledgment of the truth we are all part of.
And we have to keep doing these things. And keep ignoring "sold" reality. We need to hide it on our Facebook feed and not purchase it in the check-out lane. We need to change the channel. Literally and in our minds because this particular revolution HAS to start from within each of us.
I am cuddling with a clean dog! LOL. Rowdy has been so stinky the last several days. Way overdue for a bath and he was to the vet last week for vaccinations and a little wart on his ear. The good doc popped that thing right off there but between that and the shots my little guy was stressed out and stressed out dogs stink! Have you ever noticed that?
Anyway, we were too busy all weekend for a proper groom and bath so today after work he got the whole salon treatment.
This was after our daily walk. Our NEW habit and healthy together time. Now, you might find it hard to believe that walking isn't something the Rowdyman and I normally do, but, he is a lap dog, see? No, I mean his breed was specifically designed to sit on laps! And that is ALL they were designed to do. Oh they are very good at it. They take it really seriously too. Like, it is their JOB ya know? Their biggest worry is that more than one person will sit down in the same room at the same time. Oh, the horror! Which lap do I pick?????
Bit he also loves to romp outside and is happy to finally be allowed to be a "real" dog (he is a former show dog and a rescue). His favorite outdoor hobby is chasing squirrels. Really he isn't very good at it. Well, I mean he never catches one so I am not sure of the point but perhaps I think too much like a cat?
Anyway - I like to walk in the woods and since I have been working in the pet cem a lot lately we have been walking the path behind the house, through the woods and he has been happily chasing squirrels and they have been laughing at him (I'm convinced) and all is well with the world of dogs and small rodents.
We will try and keep up these walks for all seasons. When we had a big dog I used to walk with him everyday, without fail. He needed the exercise and movement due to hip and health issues and it was just part of our day.
It just reminds me of how easy it is to let things go when the reasons outside yourself fade away. I would think it would be just the opposite, especially if you enjoy them. I guess I will just try to convince my lap dog that we are doing this for him in order to keep my ass walking!
Sometimes things are so unclear to me. Last night I had the weirdest dreams about being forced to marry our football coach. LOL. I was sort of irritated by the whole prospect. Probably because we suck and I don't like to hang out with losers.
But, after that nonsense I had another dream in which a woman came to our house and she wanted to do a study on trees, faeries and also take the dog out for me on a daily basis. If someone showed up at your place with this list of tasks would you be a little suspicious? Well, I was not and we went about going over all the places that the faeries live on our property, other animals I talk to on a daily basis and whether they would be helpful to her, etc...
At some point I woke up a little earlier than I intended but couldn't get back to sleep and started thinking about my love of dreams and keeping track of them, interpreting them and whether they sometimes have or don't have a damn thing to do with deep inner travel so much as they have to do with what you had for dinner that evening.
For instance, I watched football on and off all afternoon and into the night. Why wouldn't I dream about football, (although marriage is a bit much). I dream about zombies a lot. I mean, A LOT. But, I watch zombies A LOT. So, that stuff makes sense. I almost think that sometimes your first dreams of the night are leftover static from the day while your brain works through and works out those sorts of things and then as the night gets deeper so do your dreams.
So, as to last night's journey, as we enter the dark season, I am thinking was to remind me of the daily magic in my life. Because having had a severely long "dry spell" things seem to be following me around at night and knocking on the doors of my memory, tugging on my shirt sleeve so to speak, and whispering to me to not forget...
And also, reminding me to not forget to let the dog out?