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And....WTH Happened? 

2/15/2015

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LOL.  THIS.IS.ME.  My downfall with physical expression (AKA working out) started some time ago.  It was fairly predictable starting with doing WAY too much for WAY too long, then a bout of exhaustion/adrenal fatigue two years ago, followed by some odd attempt at "balance" or "moderation", which only led to bouts of ~

Fuck I hate this but I'm doing it anyway....maybe I could find something I enjoy more...shit I'm lazy I need to do SOMETHING more...how short can a workout be and still be considered "a workout" anyway?...WHY am I doing this, exactly?...man I feel like crap I really should work out...ugggghhhh I gotta do this today?
Until this past September when I just STOPPED. Yup, I did what I said I would never do and I just quit working out.  Period.  I didn't mean for it to happen.  It went like this:  I was getting ready to go to Alaska in early September.  It is not impossible to work out while traveling but this trip was about Alaska for godsake!  So, I had myself a break.  When I returned life went all sideways.  I bought a house.  I moved everything that I owned out of somewhere I had lived for over 15 years, left the life that I have known and built and...  It was overwhelming.  I told myself I needed some time.  The weeks crept on.  I was busy with work and unpacking and trying to piece my existence back together.  The weeks turned into months.  I made some half hearted attempts to "re-start" my workout engine.  They'd last a few days.  One even lasted almost a whole week!  

The "holidays" approached.  I really didn't care.  The "holidays" came and went.  I made two more half-hearted attempts to reconcile with my "active lifestyle" and twice more, it didn't stick.  Winter REALLY set in.  I scowled and trudged on but still, not one bit of interest in working out. 

So here I am in mid-February.  It has been 5 1/2 months since I have had any type of physical regimen in my daily life.  This kind of hiatus has not occurred since I was a freshman in college.  That lasted one semester so we are on a roll here people...

Not feeling very optimistic about jumping back on the exercise wagon I did the only thing I know how to do. 

I jumped back on it anyway. 

I mean, really?  What the hell?  The only thing that could happen is that it won't stick again and if that does happen I'll at least have made an attempt.  If it does stick, well, all the better! 

I'm really sore.  LOL.  And being really sore does not dissuade me.  I've never minded being sore from exercise and I actually can get quite addicted to it.  But, dang, doesn't take long for everything to believe it will never be required to work again does it? 

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